Change my heart oh LORD.
Help me to "act in a manner worth of the gospel of Christ" (Phil 1:27a NIV) and that my "love may abound more and more in knowledge and discernment so that I will be able to approve what is excellent and so be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of you!" (Phil 1:9-11, ESV)
Right now my mind goes back to most that has happened early on this year till now. Mostly things early on in the year till around semester one. There are things I have done that were wrong towards others, things that were done wrong to me, but also things that were great during times spent with friends, friend. Most of all I want my heart to be lead in the direction that is worthy of God. Not to please myself but to please him who does not disappoint.
He did not, he does not, he will not disappoint. God keeps his promises.
Tuesday, 4 August 2009
You are my Jonathan
True friends are so valuable as you are able to confide in them the troubles you have. Especially when you are not able to articulate yourself yet able to be understood. And even after the conversation and the troubles are still there, just having talked and praying with them is such a blessing.
God's really blessed me with different kind of friends that I can talk to about different things. As for family, although most times I don't feel that close to, there are things I can talk to them about in which I wouldn't with friends.
One of the closest friendships you can observe in the bible is between David (King of Israel after Saul) and Jonathan (Saul's son). The loyalty and love they had for each other is so strong that Jonathan is willing to action out for David so that he will not die when his own father, King Saul was plotting to kill him. This meant that Jonathan will not take the throne after Saul as long as David lived, however he was willing to forgo that as his fear is in the LORD. You can read how they parted and loved each other as true friends in 1 Samuel 20. Previous chapters will give more insight to how it had lead to their separation.
Yesterday I had a David and Jonathan moment with Jasmine as things were a little overwhelming within a 2 hour period and my head was left in a troubling state since. Thankfully I went to a talk on the Global Health Shortcourse series that evening and Jasmine came along. She offered a lift back and catching up and praying after was awesome! Thanks Jasmine! Desiring God and finding joy in him is the only way to full satisfaction despite circumstances.
God's really blessed me with different kind of friends that I can talk to about different things. As for family, although most times I don't feel that close to, there are things I can talk to them about in which I wouldn't with friends.
One of the closest friendships you can observe in the bible is between David (King of Israel after Saul) and Jonathan (Saul's son). The loyalty and love they had for each other is so strong that Jonathan is willing to action out for David so that he will not die when his own father, King Saul was plotting to kill him. This meant that Jonathan will not take the throne after Saul as long as David lived, however he was willing to forgo that as his fear is in the LORD. You can read how they parted and loved each other as true friends in 1 Samuel 20. Previous chapters will give more insight to how it had lead to their separation.
Yesterday I had a David and Jonathan moment with Jasmine as things were a little overwhelming within a 2 hour period and my head was left in a troubling state since. Thankfully I went to a talk on the Global Health Shortcourse series that evening and Jasmine came along. She offered a lift back and catching up and praying after was awesome! Thanks Jasmine! Desiring God and finding joy in him is the only way to full satisfaction despite circumstances.
Sunday, 12 July 2009
Futurama Couch Potato
A few things I have learnt about myself the past couple of weeks. I have the ability to sit infront of the TV and just enjoy munching on food and watching episode after episode of Futurama.
It's great because they are only 20mins each and therefore a just right amount of time to amuse the mind. It's not too long that you need to set aside long periods of time to watch it, and not to short that a story isn't developed in a single episode. There is wit, character development and story connection and growth from episode to episode.
Bender's Big Score the first Futurama was witty, well built and not confusing despite the amount of time travel that occured and brilliant in the way it connected with all the episodes from the first 4 seasons. You get a lot more out of it if you have watched many of season 1-4 episodes.
Loving the couch potato, el cheapo, popcorn in hand in front of the TV and Futurama.
It's great because they are only 20mins each and therefore a just right amount of time to amuse the mind. It's not too long that you need to set aside long periods of time to watch it, and not to short that a story isn't developed in a single episode. There is wit, character development and story connection and growth from episode to episode.
Bender's Big Score the first Futurama was witty, well built and not confusing despite the amount of time travel that occured and brilliant in the way it connected with all the episodes from the first 4 seasons. You get a lot more out of it if you have watched many of season 1-4 episodes.
Loving the couch potato, el cheapo, popcorn in hand in front of the TV and Futurama.
Tuesday, 7 July 2009
Less human power and wisdom
'Little Women' by Louisa M. Alcott.
One of the chapters that hit me "what a good book this is" was during chapter 8. I think it will be the one highlight of the book and remember which chapter it came from. It is about 15 year old Jo's anger and stubbornness towards forgiving her sister who had wronged her early in the chapter. Only does she realise later how her impatience leading to spite against her sister that she came close to losing her sister to death during angry and unforgiven terms.
She learns from her mother who has the same problem as her during her age but over the years have learned to control her (Jo's mother) temper and also through the help of her husband's patient character. I love the words from her mother who comforts Jo at the end "If I don't seem to need help, it is because I have a better friend than Father to comfort and sustain me. My child the trouble and temptations of your life are beginning, and may be many; but you can overcome and outlive them all if you learn to feel the strength and tenderness of your Heavenly Father as you do that of your earthly one. The more you love and trust him, the nearer you will feel to him, and the less you will depend on human power and wisdom. His love and care never tire or change, can never be taken from you, but may become the source of lifelong peace, happiness, and strength. Believe this heartily, and go to God with all your little cares, and hopes, and sins, and sorrows, as freely and confidingly as you come to your mother."
I guess that hit home because I have an impatience in me that isn't good and I dislike it. It comes our particularly on people that are closest and I think it is because normally I am angry or annoyed at myself for something and take it out on them which isn't right. I know one of the key traits I would look for in a husband is his patience to counter mine. There is much to work on.
One of the chapters that hit me "what a good book this is" was during chapter 8. I think it will be the one highlight of the book and remember which chapter it came from. It is about 15 year old Jo's anger and stubbornness towards forgiving her sister who had wronged her early in the chapter. Only does she realise later how her impatience leading to spite against her sister that she came close to losing her sister to death during angry and unforgiven terms.
She learns from her mother who has the same problem as her during her age but over the years have learned to control her (Jo's mother) temper and also through the help of her husband's patient character. I love the words from her mother who comforts Jo at the end "If I don't seem to need help, it is because I have a better friend than Father to comfort and sustain me. My child the trouble and temptations of your life are beginning, and may be many; but you can overcome and outlive them all if you learn to feel the strength and tenderness of your Heavenly Father as you do that of your earthly one. The more you love and trust him, the nearer you will feel to him, and the less you will depend on human power and wisdom. His love and care never tire or change, can never be taken from you, but may become the source of lifelong peace, happiness, and strength. Believe this heartily, and go to God with all your little cares, and hopes, and sins, and sorrows, as freely and confidingly as you come to your mother."
I guess that hit home because I have an impatience in me that isn't good and I dislike it. It comes our particularly on people that are closest and I think it is because normally I am angry or annoyed at myself for something and take it out on them which isn't right. I know one of the key traits I would look for in a husband is his patience to counter mine. There is much to work on.
Wednesday, 24 June 2009
Resolution
Personal resolution from emotional ups and downs usually come about when there is a realisation of the situation. Realisation that you have been focusing on the wrong solution, or been asking the wrong questions in search of a solution. Most of the time that realisation is the what stands between the person and God, and the person's attitude towards the outcome God provides.
If we're always arguing with God, why why why, it's not going to allow us to go anywhere because we're getting bogged down by questioning the God who knows all, who was there from before the beginning, the one who runs the entire existence of world and beyond. If we're not humble enough to accept his control, we won't be able to control ourselves and the situation. The realisation will not emerge and the resolution will not settle.
However crying out why to God is not a bad thing. He longs for us to be honest and bring our troubles to him. I guess it's more so the way we go about.
Wrong question,
Wrong attitude,
No solution?
Think again.
If we're always arguing with God, why why why, it's not going to allow us to go anywhere because we're getting bogged down by questioning the God who knows all, who was there from before the beginning, the one who runs the entire existence of world and beyond. If we're not humble enough to accept his control, we won't be able to control ourselves and the situation. The realisation will not emerge and the resolution will not settle.
However crying out why to God is not a bad thing. He longs for us to be honest and bring our troubles to him. I guess it's more so the way we go about.
Wrong question,
Wrong attitude,
No solution?
Think again.
Tuesday, 16 June 2009
Exams again and the power of words
Time period: 2009 sem 1 exams, week 2
I've been following Kat's (Fyffe) blog for the past couple of days and it's incredible to read what goes on in her mind. It feels like as if I've been interacting with her when I haven't physically seen her (or interacted with her properly) probably since summer really, but did once at Broadway at uni when she was hanging with Josh a few weeks back. It feels like I can connect with what she's feeling now about their breakup because of her posts.
That reminded me of my old blog I started with livejournal because Kat uses that, (no surprise that it was starting during a period I was working on a major assignment...procrastination) and so I flicked to it. The posts then (old as 2005) was able to hit me as well. It's strange how words can communicate the inner thoughts. Even words as old as that. This reminds me that even more so incredible is the power of the word of God, even more ancient stuff that is very much alive and cuts the heart at all levels!
On a thought level I guess I'll mention (no one reads this anyway) that a friend (that I consider a friend of significance) who I felt has been aloof the past few months is back! During the aloof period it felt like there was a massive canyon/void between us that for some reason sometime I felt cut. I hope that he doesn't go aloof again as there is really only the remainder of this year left where we are both on the same campus. It's harder to maintain contact when circumstances and lifestyle changes. However it's great to have him back for now in which I have happily commented twice to him.
I've been following Kat's (Fyffe) blog for the past couple of days and it's incredible to read what goes on in her mind. It feels like as if I've been interacting with her when I haven't physically seen her (or interacted with her properly) probably since summer really, but did once at Broadway at uni when she was hanging with Josh a few weeks back. It feels like I can connect with what she's feeling now about their breakup because of her posts.
That reminded me of my old blog I started with livejournal because Kat uses that, (no surprise that it was starting during a period I was working on a major assignment...procrastination) and so I flicked to it. The posts then (old as 2005) was able to hit me as well. It's strange how words can communicate the inner thoughts. Even words as old as that. This reminds me that even more so incredible is the power of the word of God, even more ancient stuff that is very much alive and cuts the heart at all levels!
On a thought level I guess I'll mention (no one reads this anyway) that a friend (that I consider a friend of significance) who I felt has been aloof the past few months is back! During the aloof period it felt like there was a massive canyon/void between us that for some reason sometime I felt cut. I hope that he doesn't go aloof again as there is really only the remainder of this year left where we are both on the same campus. It's harder to maintain contact when circumstances and lifestyle changes. However it's great to have him back for now in which I have happily commented twice to him.
Thursday, 13 November 2008
Exams. Done a lot of other things.
Exams. Procrastination. Videos. Youtube. Google. In the midst of exams I've been utterly unproductive when it comes to study. However with other things I've done a lot of. Done a lot meaning being distracted by doing a lot of other things to avoid study. As for googling I don't know why but recently googled inters camp and found that overseas Christian camps are running labled as Inters Camp. It's awesome. I stumbled across this guy's blog that mentioned about an inters camp he was at. I saw another blog which had the same camp name. It's so good to know and read that there are other Christian leaders willing to lead kids, have fun and learn more about God's word.
Another inters camp site lead me to an interview with Chris Tomlin that show how simple the song "How Great is our God" is yet so powerful. Finally a CD, I can purchase from Koorong or Word, that will guarantee me at least a couple of great songs in the album because of the artist and the video I've seen of him demonstrating and singing 'How Great is our God'.
Also last night I finally won an ebay item that was on a bid. I never win items that have to be bidded. However it all changed last night. It was just a t-shirt, but I won!
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