Sticky Crawly Season

Check it out, cool stick insect (Phasmatodea) I found on a guar poly line elbow in the Secondary Cleaners Recleaners Circuit.

Bug season is coming out!

I keep finding mini red/brown ants in my room who somehow find their way to crumbs I might leave behind. This time all food is locked out or in the fridge even if it may not require refrigeration. When I got back from R&R I found them inside my guitar case and crawling on the guitar when I was attempting some strumming. The cockroaches seem to hang (evidence is cockroach poo) around especially when no one occupies the room for a week... their appearance have lessened since I started occupying the room again.

I Fell Into Marriage

A few weeks ago I had a conversation that went along the lines of, (starting halfway in).

Person: Don’t ever get married
Me pulls a facial expression which triggers questions
Person: Oh, you’re married
Me: No
Person: Engaged?
Me: No
Person: Boyfriend?
Me: No
Person: I cannot believe that you do not have a partner/bf/(whatever term they used) with the way you look (can’t recall exact works but it was something along those lines)
Me: It’s not about looks

And then he ranted on about he was crazy to get married and it was not possible to say no to when you fall in love.

And I debated on about how marriage is a choice, that love is being willing to stick through everything, and who he and his wife now will not be the same people in X years time. And who his wife is in the future will be different to who he fell for then etc etc.

His reasoning (excuse for not living up to his initial comment) for getting married is because he was scared of his wife, and could not say no. Like he could not escape her and did not have a choice. I think he was still okay with marrying her, as in he does not regret it.

Despite how he justified why he got married, marriage is still a choice. Even for those who were in difficult circumstances where they were oppressed and manipulated ie. “If you don’t marry me I will … this civilisation”, still made a choice even if consequences influenced their decision. Unfortunately there are many loveless broken marriages.

Before the discussion ended up going around in circles he concluded that his point was you cannot avoid it when you love someone.

We agreed on that.

As for the definition of loving someone and how one lives out that love is a whole other story.

Optimising Crap

This post has been expanded from recent conversations with those who have demobilised site in the last few days.

Pretty things grow from crap. You know the "Ugly Duckling" story, the fruit tree doesn't taste as sweet without manure situation.

It is easier to remember the bad, frustrating times. It is in our nature to amplify and headline the bad than the good. We are natural at complaining and criticising…because we are never satisfied, we yearn for better and better and yet nothing earthly ultimately satisfies.

How often do you see headlines and articles like ‘Awesome Sunny Skies Spans City’, but instead we see more of the storms and the dollars that insurances will probably need to pay out. Yeah okay these gloomy articles are useful to warn people to prepare of the dangers if the weather bureau can provide enough useful advanced notice. But what about the articles on how to prepare for ‘Awesome Sunny Skies’, or ‘Rebel the Typical Night Out’. You know better-awesome-r things to converse around instead of activities such as binge-ing, or doosh doosh venues, or 'heading out with the boys to the Doll House'.

I will not deny that for the project I have been on this year has been an accomplishment, for the client, supervisors, ground crews, and the EPCM team who worked through all the ups, downs, joys and frustrations. We persevered and had fun in the end even if there were crappy moments, a lot of it.

Those who lasted longer on the project can probably concur even if it has been frustrating. Those who did not stay as long may not agree because perhaps they did not see things from the beginning, middle, end and the times it was fun and/or less stressed.

If I were to take onboard the above rant, the personal highlights and opportunities from this project would be:

1. Learnt what not to do
2. Worked with people who piss you off but at the same time can also make you laugh
3. Learnt more about the equipment and processes and how to find a solution. This outcome would not be if the conflict / issue did not arise in the first place.
4. Met a niche people who I would not interact with if I was not onsite
5. Learn to stand my ground, challenge people
6. Learnt about my flimsy, changing character, which I constantly have to work on
7. Learnt more about people and how culture affects the state of the plant, the state of the project, the work morale
8. To be good at things requires dedicated take time, ie music, fitness
9. Still learning how to not scatter the crap and leaving no room for that seed to sprout for good outcomes to grow.
10. Stilll learning not to be in a “try not to care” about things because it will frustrate me more, but instead to find that balance of “caring” to take pride in the work but at the same time not to plummet to a disappointed, negative state because that pride is hurt.
11. And probably more!

In conclusion, utilise the negative and crap around us, find or plant the seed and cultivate it to something useful. Have you been in a similar situation?

PS. Note, not all crap is useful if weeds have already take root, get rid of them.

Big Fish

To lighten the load, I am resorting to blogging on trivial matters of life, however still important stuff when it comes to physical daily survival. Food. We are very fortunate in comparison to the rest of the world, and get it in abundance here onsite.

Biggest fish served ever for the upfront orders for dinner since I have been onsite. The photo taken does not serve the actual size of it well however compare it to the size of the cutlery and the plate, it nearly covered the plate! I was not beaten and the stomach still won and cleared out that fish.

For some reason they seem to serve me steak or fish orders in large pieces, or double without request. Maybe they think I need some beefing up..

Rubbish Habits

You can tell a lot about a person's habits from looking at their rubbish bin.

Observations about the user of the following bin (guess who).

1. Has access to disposable cups
2. Eats honeycomb icecream
3. Flosses (but irregularly)
4. Female

Image taken on 14 October 2011 21:00

Months Later

Need creativity. Craziness. It has been too long without colour.

It has been 9 months site based for work now. There is now a guitar, digital piano in the donga I stay in at the village. I do not practice as much as I like to. I was routinely running / exercising for months till roughly 3 months back now. Lacking motivation after a long days work even though I know the extra is beneficial. It is getting difficult being in the field all the time keeping track of the fixes and closing off on paperwork at the same time.

Currently on R&R at the moment feeling empty when it comes to people.

There is this sense of "fake", "boring" when they come to mind. This is clearly not true of all people, but walked out feeling it acutely on my last swing. Perhaps feeling low that people are willingly to talk honestly about others without saying it to the subject's face whom they are talking about. Or perhaps this whole tip toeing around the client without telling them as it is. Perhaps there is a tact to how to say it and is yet to be developed as it comes with experience. No one is perfect and of course I say things about people without them always knowing it first hand even if most of the time I would have said it at least once to their face. Sometimes indirectly ( / hypothetically) when the hypothetic is not a theory but reality.

It is very difficult to be godly in such a situation and difficult to remind myself who I am. That my attitude / feeling / behaviour does not reflect who I ultimately am trying to become.

Feels like I am hole digging. On the upper hand, I bought a new set of felt tip coloured pens. They are cool, perhaps I may get back into some pen on paper artistic streak which probably will not be a lasting project. heh. Also stumbled across a common verse that "our struggle is not against flesh and blood" a good reminder there is a greater spiritual battle going on behind the scenes of the above nonsense I have been writing.

Mount Keith

Day 4: I am currently site based for work now. I'm in the mid west of Western Australia, the desert. It has been a long awaiting for under 6 months now and it has been good. Different, because you are not exposed to what your routine is like back home. For me that is in the Perth metro / suburban.

The accommodation village about 15 mins south of the mine and Nickel plant facility has had power cuts and unfortunately does not have generators. Only the plant does. The heat kicks in when you have been sitting in air conditioned areas. Also water is affected without power. It would be an inconvenience if you were half way in a shower with soapy hair and the power is cut. hhaha.. Just before heading to sleep last night the power cut and I was glad I brought a torch to bring the washing in from the rain. It was very hot lying there on the bed. Thankfully the power kicked back in an hour later.

The closest town is ~85km north, Wiluna or another one over an hour's drive at Leinster. Facilities at the village are gym, wet mess (tavern), dry mess (dining hall, kitchen), swimming pool, tennis/bbl/cricket courts, computer area (where I am now getting access to internet), sit around grass areas and a track around to go for walks or runs.

At work, the plant seems really complex at first with tanks, piping, cables, instruments, pumps running everywhere but it is possible to get use to where and what things are eventually. I'd need many more days here though. It is also very hot out at the plant, 40+ degrees. Looking forward to see what winter will hold as the conditions are at extremes out here.

As for the people of course it is predominantly males onsite but I wasn't surprised about that. However there are girls around too so it's not a complete isolation from the female gender.

Anyway logging out to grab some dinner at dry mess....I'm changing my mind now that maybe I should go for a run to get into routine.

Music - the technical side is worth it!

I've develop a love for music progressively last year.

Since I started work I've really appreciated my hands and fingers. We do so much with them with emails, writing, drawing, hold, eat etc.

At the beginning of last year I had the urge to know how to play on the piano George Winston's arrangement of Pachebel's infamous Canon in D. So I started playing the piano after 10 years!

I still have not finished that initial task because I got distracted with other scores. However since then there has been stages where I am realising all that practice, all the technical stuff I did for 5 piano exams were worth it in the end. I hated the practice then, but now I really appreciate the lessons I had to go through.

Early this year I was disappointed at first that I was trained classically (instead of knowing how to play by ear, play chords, variations of chords, play on the spot by just reading chords). But I realise that it is better to have the technical background (classical piano teaches a lot of that) to move forward.

because

Since I started trying to learn Rhythmic Patterns on the piano and picking up the acoustic guitar, all that training with scales etc. is helping me appreciate music and how it's framed so much more!

However if anyone is putting their kids through classical piano lessons, I highly recommend that they also get training how to play by ear with chords, patterns and variations of it. Because those who just hate the idea that they can only play by reading sheet music will dislike the classical training very much and not realise its importance.

I really appreciate my hands. God willing I hope they last many years.

His plan

I love the fact that my brother is engaged. There are a lot of things to hold my breath about because the current future (this lifetime) is so uncertain, but God works according to his timing and plan. So I can trust that!

I may not seem excited on the outside but inside there is a smile in his direction. I recalled last time that he was working on site years ago in Karratha and a similar occurrence could have occurred but turned out otherwise.. I was sadden to witness confusion, hurt and betrayal. Years later he's working on site again and now engaged (different person of course)! The first outcome although may have seemed negative, however turned out for the best else this current engagement would not be!

Lord, plan their life so that it builds your kingdom and no other.

Zero Care Factor

I think if there was an occupation which the main task consisted of being lazy, I'd be the king of it.

Or queen.

Either way I think inbuilt in part of people is the tendency to not care when things matter. I find that with myself lately that a lot of things I have put a lot of time in there is an expire date on how much I care about it. It seems with the stuff that takes up regular time, 4 years seems to be the limit.

Once I've been with something / organisation / ministry for 4 years it seems that I step out of it. For instance, the Uni student organisation I was heavily involved in (AIESEC) was 4 years. Circumstances did influence reason for finishing it off. Also stopping involvement in it as an active member was the best thing when it came to my relationship with God.

The four year thing seems to be the same for youth group now, started in 2007 and finishing off this year because I won't really be in Perth the first half of next year.

Perhaps the lowered care factor is my mechanism to move on.

Pro Macbook 13"

The Macbook Pro (MBP)

I purchased a reburfished MBP 13" from the online apple site. Saved about $200.

Their shipping is impressive, as they use express TNT and it pretty much arrived the day after they processed my order.

Silence

Hi God

You have heard less from me lately. =S

Despite that I know you see me and hear me and know me.

I thought to quickly say hello to acknowledge I have not forgotten you despite silence from my end.

Hope to spend time soon to share feelings of life's drudgery. Help me to listen fully to you then too and our conversation may be two way.

Catch you soon

J

Grace Trumps (conflict & resolution)

Life is complicated.

From my previous post I have had a little bit more time to absorb the complications of life. The bible is relatively black and white about some things. Some things are grey or never mentioned, so you have to look at the black and white to discern the grey and not mentioned areas.

There are also things that we desire to see as green, red, blue or another colour instead of the black and white. We justify stuff to meet our colours. Not good.

Compared to most people I think, I think relatively different to them. I am very much a realist, not a skeptic, but a realist. That is why the very thing I hope in is in Christ alone, that he died and rose again so that we may live for his glory. That is real and God does not lie or fail on his promise. In his great mercy...

Life is complicated, there are many variables such as emotions, history, people, culture, nature etc etc. The thing I love about engineering is it is challenging and ends up more complicated than it begins. But that's what makes it interesting and keeps someone on their toes! Sure it can be frustrating too, but more fulfilling at the end when the task is completed!

I suppose the same goes with relationships.. conflict and complications keeps you on your toes. It screams at you to not become complacent. It challenges you to think about God's love and how to act it out genuinely (even if it may not begin as something genuine). It pushes you to look for solutions, to serve the other person/s and to resolve the conflict. Only then does the relationship grow ten fold! Only then you grow in Christ too!

The relationship the body of Christ, 'the bride' will have with him on that day, will be intensely amazing because of his great love, demonstrated by the amazing rescue of his people from darkness to light. Because there was a problem to start with, rebellion and disobedience against God, and because there is the solution, grace, the end result will be glorious!

Extending from the above basis, and knowing that we live in a fallen world, I acknowledge that is why conflict exists. However in this world, without conflict we would not have the opportunity to solve it together and therefore not really grow genuine relationships.


What is my point to this post? I think this is where I’m heading:

1) Conflict is real, it’s not good, but it is an opportunity for a solution to arise for a good outcome. Just like rebellion and sin is not good, but an opportunity for the greatest outcome ever.

2) That outcome, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy, he has given us new birth into a living hope, through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead” (1 Peter 1:3, NIV).
a. Grace trumps everything!
b. Grace trumps baggage.
c. Grace trumps your old way of life.
d. Grace trumps your sinful nature.
e. Grace trumps current sins.
f. Grace trumps future sins.
g. Grace motivates you to saturate your life with Christ, the King!
h. Grace gives everlasting life, a real relationship with our Creator.
i. Grace ended the war between us and God, and brought peace!
j. Grace gave us freedom from slavery to sin!

3) Colours, black and white. Knowing 1) and 2) therefore let us seek out God and colour our very lives by his living Word. As free men, live as slaves to Christ. Throw away your old pencils and use the ones branded by Grace.

Wherever you come from in your stage of life, remember that whatever conflict you had to face, and will face, Grace trumps, even before you’ve worked through it he stamped it out. How amazingly in charge of time God is!

Just don’t get complacent and return to your old pencils…even the ones that you were not aware of.


PS. If you have read this far, let me acknowledge that I am no saint. Words are one thing, actions are another.
To saturate my life with Christ is absolutely difficult. Especially when I hope for so much more in this lifetime when it is already more than sufficient that grace and a life with him has been given freely.

Divorce

.

There's so much to say on this topic, but it's ridiculously sobering/frustrating/heavy/whywhywhywhy!?

When I look first at how God views and feels about marriage, and then divorce, I totally understand the gravity and sacredness of marriage! I also get how God sees non-married people too, and understand that those in that circumstance has to take their current status seriously too.

However on the topic of this post, it makes me sick that it exists, that it happens, and is happening..

Marriage is awesome and a great blessing, between a man and woman (only).

But when you look at the statistics and the broken relationships...even amongst Christians..garh!

It's impossible without Christ.

Take marriage seriously and with thankfulness, and even more so never ever take divorce lightly....if you are willing, do not even consider that option!

Christ has restored the relationship between God and us, our relationships should be motivated to reflect him.

If you have something to say about the topic, comment! I'll be interested to see if there is something new that I have not thought about it yet.

Soon to be official Graduate Engineer

Yikes, it has been 2.5months since I blogged last.

In summary regarding work I have been employed as a tech clerk at Lycopodium Minerals for 2 months now. Although I am not employed as a graduate engineer:

• It is such a privilege and honour to be working
• I still struggle to wake up however I look forward to head into work
• I have been given tasks related to engineering
• Having an income enables me to budget and have a little bit more freedom to pay things off
• It has been a blessing!

Prior to commencing work there was the possibility to be permanently employed as a graduate engineer after 2-3 months of work. Why I was not employed as a graduate was because there was no graduate role for environmental engineering. Heck, they don't have any enviro staff except for one stationed at the Rio office, I'm pretty much the first environmental engineering background related person employed in that company. However willing to do any sort of work to get my foot in the door they suggested a tech clerk role. The manager of the group I have been working under is about 30% through his annual leave. I have been contemplating whether to wait out another 3 weeks or talk directly to the manager that I originally was suppose to work under/had the initial employment agreement. However circumstances helped me make my decision as I bumped into the manager I had been thinking of talking to about future employment opportunities and it so happened that the both of us had in mind it was time to chat.

I can really see God's hand in all this because things happened in a way we do not imagine. New work came through for the company around the same time and now for the next 6 months I will be working on that! How opportune! Good reports about me have been filtered through to this manager despite myself not working under him as well. God is so awesome! Despite my imperfections he blesses us!

The chat was good with the manager/director however a bit overwhelming because a reason he was willing to take me on board was the potential to build up a knowledge base within the company who knew how to deal with the environmental issues. Personally I think everyone needs to know that kind of stuff when they are dealing with all aspects of a project from design to construction to commissioning and operations. Not just the environmental engineer (because that’s not what we are specifically trained for). Acknowledging that not everyone can be the expert in it, it was fair how he saw things progressing in the company. I am only afraid that building up on my technical experience in engineering will be hindered by only knowing about environmental policies and the bearer of bad news, ie “you will have to redesign because it doesn’t meet standards”. However for now experiencing all aspects of work that commences as a study to becoming a bankable project, where it comes to life , constructed and fully operating is currently the potential plan for me as a graduate engineer.

It is not all down on paper yet but by the end of 3 months with Lyco and all goes well the paper work should be officialised!

Saying all the above I know it is going to be a struggle to tear away from this when full time ministry is still in the plans. I find engineering work exciting, challenging, dynamic and rewarding. Staying in this kind of work for a long time would not be a drag. It is going to be a difficult debate in my head when the time comes.

Empty Love. The Conflict.

I recently had the topic of love and the conflict of it brought up within the span of a few days.

Prior to Valentines Day

I had spent a week preparing a talk and presented it at youth group on 1 John 4:7-21. The main point is that God is love. The passage backs up this big idea is that; 1) love is his nature, 2) he demonstrates his love through his Son Jesus, 3) and we love because he first loved us. The absense/rejection of God means that it is impossible to love (complete love).

The Eve of Valentines Day (night after youth group)

An event occured when an unloving act/words came from me towards my mum. And it was only 2-3 sentences I said to her about an email she brought up! It made me think, was I teaching the young people at youth group empty words as I urged them to sort out their issues with their brothers and sisters in Christ so that they can love one another and also be more effective for Christ because conflict is resolved?

Valentines Day

I prayfully considered that I needed to apologise for my words towards my mum and did it that evening as I helped her prepare for Chinese New Year Dinner (combined with sis and my birthday dinner). This may seem insignificant but for me to verbally apologise is rare within our immediate family. Our family is not very verbal, and when it comes to resolving issues, we just know it in the back of our heads and hearts that whatever happened it happened and we can go on with life. However I thought, true unity communicates and solves conflict in all forms. This stemmed from another talk I had prepared for youth group the week before that we are united because our Identity is in Christ Jesus.

The resolution was great because I think it did lead us to become more effective for Christ as we continued our conversation about ministry. Communication lines were opening!

Love is also empty if we do 'good' things, humanitarian work, service for others without God, or we do it out of obligation as the world watches and judges what a Christian should be like. I read that recently from a random blog when I clicked "next blog" for kicks.

The experience I had was brought up in a conversation with a friend of mine (Angela). Later she brought up an incident that had happened to her that very weekend of Valentines. It was similar to mine but different.

It was great to see that we both experienced LOVE (imagine me saying it in a rough voice) than the "love" (this time the sound of an angelic voice) many couples world wide may have spent their weekends. Disclaimer: not saying the love of couples were not genuine, I believe those under God, were experiencing and acting out in true love. Love is tough and I think those experiences are the most beneficial for real growth in relationships. We can surely concur with the love of God, demonstrated at the cross.

Thank God for his Holy Spirit who works so powerfully in us to love one another!

Broken Cigarette and a Sniper

Woke up from a dream today. I don't normally dream much nowadays. I was being chased. The dream was located in the present time because the sniper was shooting from a very long distance away and the gun technology was recent.

In the dream I was located in a place mixed between NTE 2010 AFES accommodation, and dorms that had similar windows to the Serpentine Baptist Campsite. However once you escape out of the accommodation area its a bit jungly/rural/not so built up.

Last night I was hanging out with school friends and some brought up dreams. Some of them in the room were Buddhists, an "atheist" interested to look into Buddhism, a couple of Agnostics and one other Christian. Someone mentioned that people only make dreams into something because they make something out of it. Where as if you don't make anything out of it, it means nothing.

Either way all I appreciated is that where I live now as a Christian, it's so easy to carry the message of the gospel because our persecution is nothing compared to those who are chased all the time, where their lives are literally at danger to the point of physical death. Paul the apostle if you read in Acts 9 during his early years of ministry was lowered out of a hole in the wall in Damascus because people were plotting to kill him. There were a lot more troubles than that, and close to the end of the written account about him in Acts, he was placed in jail all because of a misunderstanding!

However I don't think my dream had primarily to do with being persecuted for my faith because all I recall about being put in that situation was I was holding a cigarette that was falling apart and we were locating a room related to these goods. Only read into it in the first place because of the location of the dream. I guess you can't read too much into dreams and also I don't really read into it. All I know is that the feeling of being chased by people with experience in weapons is scary. Thanks to God he's got greater control since we now no longer fear death.

Not all advice is advice..

Have you read this before? Are you finding that the advice Candice is giving is a bit one sided and suited for particular type of girls? I read this a while back but something triggered me to ask another opinion...

I find it hard to nod to 100% to what she's advising. There are agreeable stuff, then she taints that good stuff with stuff like part of an answer to Q3, "It's his job to lead and if you jump the gun, assuming this role, you'll be establishing an unsettling pattern."

As if a girl can never tell a guy she likes him and then leave the ball in his court....besides no one is leading anyone considering there is nothing to lead when there is no BGR (boy girl relationship) yet. Also from a biblical perspective no where does it say in the bible, a woman cannot ask a man out. Sure most girls (myself included) would prefer that the guy initiates it...however imagine a couple dating for 6 years and the girl is thinking..what's going on, is she to wait for him (possible another few years...) to 'take the lead' and ask her hand in marriage or does she make it clear (jump the gun) and if he doesn't act then...goodbye, since they are wasting each other's time. Oops did she just lead by leaving him?

There's some good articles on that website, but seriously that QnA page doesn't serve the site justice.

Thoughts?

Living for the King

This Life I Live
© Michael Morrow 2009

This life I live is not my own
For my Redeemer paid the price
He took it to be his alone
To be his treasure and his prize
The things of earth I leave behind
To live in worship of my King
His is the right to rule my life
Mine is the joy to live for him

I died to sin upon the cross
I'm bound to Jesus in his death
The old is gone and now I must
Rely on him for every breath
With every footstep that I tread
What mysteries he has in store
I cannot know what lies ahead
But know that he has gone before

There is a voice that pierced the grave
A power that rolled the stone away
A sound of life, I know I'm saved
The voice of God has called my name
So I will rise, and in the air
Behold the glory of the King
I will not fear to meet him there
I know my life is hid with him


What an awesome summary of what it means to live for the King!

This life I lead is not my own...to be his treasure and his prize...His is the right to rule my life...

..Behold the glory of the King...


The song sang live at NTE 2009 can be downloaded at Morrow's website

Numbers

It is a great time to be reading Numbers. Probably for the first time I am enjoying reading God's law. It becomes interesting when you pull things apart, draw diagrams, see how it all fits and how detailed things were accounted for.

Mind exploding stuff.

The picture coming out so far is God is not chaotic and he is very holy. VERY HOLY.

The massive contrast is that we are very unholy and unclean.

That there is great cost, life of animals, lengths and things to do (sacrifices etc.) to become clean before God. And even then those sacrifices only made the Israelites clean temporarily.

It shows how much Christ has done to made us clean, a people purified for himself. Now that we have been made righteous through his blood on the cross and his life, we are now holy before God!

That's love, that's the ultimate sacrifice!