Sticky Crawly Season

Check it out, cool stick insect (Phasmatodea) I found on a guar poly line elbow in the Secondary Cleaners Recleaners Circuit.

Bug season is coming out!

I keep finding mini red/brown ants in my room who somehow find their way to crumbs I might leave behind. This time all food is locked out or in the fridge even if it may not require refrigeration. When I got back from R&R I found them inside my guitar case and crawling on the guitar when I was attempting some strumming. The cockroaches seem to hang (evidence is cockroach poo) around especially when no one occupies the room for a week... their appearance have lessened since I started occupying the room again.

I Fell Into Marriage

A few weeks ago I had a conversation that went along the lines of, (starting halfway in).

Person: Don’t ever get married
Me pulls a facial expression which triggers questions
Person: Oh, you’re married
Me: No
Person: Engaged?
Me: No
Person: Boyfriend?
Me: No
Person: I cannot believe that you do not have a partner/bf/(whatever term they used) with the way you look (can’t recall exact works but it was something along those lines)
Me: It’s not about looks

And then he ranted on about he was crazy to get married and it was not possible to say no to when you fall in love.

And I debated on about how marriage is a choice, that love is being willing to stick through everything, and who he and his wife now will not be the same people in X years time. And who his wife is in the future will be different to who he fell for then etc etc.

His reasoning (excuse for not living up to his initial comment) for getting married is because he was scared of his wife, and could not say no. Like he could not escape her and did not have a choice. I think he was still okay with marrying her, as in he does not regret it.

Despite how he justified why he got married, marriage is still a choice. Even for those who were in difficult circumstances where they were oppressed and manipulated ie. “If you don’t marry me I will … this civilisation”, still made a choice even if consequences influenced their decision. Unfortunately there are many loveless broken marriages.

Before the discussion ended up going around in circles he concluded that his point was you cannot avoid it when you love someone.

We agreed on that.

As for the definition of loving someone and how one lives out that love is a whole other story.

Optimising Crap

This post has been expanded from recent conversations with those who have demobilised site in the last few days.

Pretty things grow from crap. You know the "Ugly Duckling" story, the fruit tree doesn't taste as sweet without manure situation.

It is easier to remember the bad, frustrating times. It is in our nature to amplify and headline the bad than the good. We are natural at complaining and criticising…because we are never satisfied, we yearn for better and better and yet nothing earthly ultimately satisfies.

How often do you see headlines and articles like ‘Awesome Sunny Skies Spans City’, but instead we see more of the storms and the dollars that insurances will probably need to pay out. Yeah okay these gloomy articles are useful to warn people to prepare of the dangers if the weather bureau can provide enough useful advanced notice. But what about the articles on how to prepare for ‘Awesome Sunny Skies’, or ‘Rebel the Typical Night Out’. You know better-awesome-r things to converse around instead of activities such as binge-ing, or doosh doosh venues, or 'heading out with the boys to the Doll House'.

I will not deny that for the project I have been on this year has been an accomplishment, for the client, supervisors, ground crews, and the EPCM team who worked through all the ups, downs, joys and frustrations. We persevered and had fun in the end even if there were crappy moments, a lot of it.

Those who lasted longer on the project can probably concur even if it has been frustrating. Those who did not stay as long may not agree because perhaps they did not see things from the beginning, middle, end and the times it was fun and/or less stressed.

If I were to take onboard the above rant, the personal highlights and opportunities from this project would be:

1. Learnt what not to do
2. Worked with people who piss you off but at the same time can also make you laugh
3. Learnt more about the equipment and processes and how to find a solution. This outcome would not be if the conflict / issue did not arise in the first place.
4. Met a niche people who I would not interact with if I was not onsite
5. Learn to stand my ground, challenge people
6. Learnt about my flimsy, changing character, which I constantly have to work on
7. Learnt more about people and how culture affects the state of the plant, the state of the project, the work morale
8. To be good at things requires dedicated take time, ie music, fitness
9. Still learning how to not scatter the crap and leaving no room for that seed to sprout for good outcomes to grow.
10. Stilll learning not to be in a “try not to care” about things because it will frustrate me more, but instead to find that balance of “caring” to take pride in the work but at the same time not to plummet to a disappointed, negative state because that pride is hurt.
11. And probably more!

In conclusion, utilise the negative and crap around us, find or plant the seed and cultivate it to something useful. Have you been in a similar situation?

PS. Note, not all crap is useful if weeds have already take root, get rid of them.

Big Fish

To lighten the load, I am resorting to blogging on trivial matters of life, however still important stuff when it comes to physical daily survival. Food. We are very fortunate in comparison to the rest of the world, and get it in abundance here onsite.

Biggest fish served ever for the upfront orders for dinner since I have been onsite. The photo taken does not serve the actual size of it well however compare it to the size of the cutlery and the plate, it nearly covered the plate! I was not beaten and the stomach still won and cleared out that fish.

For some reason they seem to serve me steak or fish orders in large pieces, or double without request. Maybe they think I need some beefing up..

Rubbish Habits

You can tell a lot about a person's habits from looking at their rubbish bin.

Observations about the user of the following bin (guess who).

1. Has access to disposable cups
2. Eats honeycomb icecream
3. Flosses (but irregularly)
4. Female

Image taken on 14 October 2011 21:00

Months Later

Need creativity. Craziness. It has been too long without colour.

It has been 9 months site based for work now. There is now a guitar, digital piano in the donga I stay in at the village. I do not practice as much as I like to. I was routinely running / exercising for months till roughly 3 months back now. Lacking motivation after a long days work even though I know the extra is beneficial. It is getting difficult being in the field all the time keeping track of the fixes and closing off on paperwork at the same time.

Currently on R&R at the moment feeling empty when it comes to people.

There is this sense of "fake", "boring" when they come to mind. This is clearly not true of all people, but walked out feeling it acutely on my last swing. Perhaps feeling low that people are willingly to talk honestly about others without saying it to the subject's face whom they are talking about. Or perhaps this whole tip toeing around the client without telling them as it is. Perhaps there is a tact to how to say it and is yet to be developed as it comes with experience. No one is perfect and of course I say things about people without them always knowing it first hand even if most of the time I would have said it at least once to their face. Sometimes indirectly ( / hypothetically) when the hypothetic is not a theory but reality.

It is very difficult to be godly in such a situation and difficult to remind myself who I am. That my attitude / feeling / behaviour does not reflect who I ultimately am trying to become.

Feels like I am hole digging. On the upper hand, I bought a new set of felt tip coloured pens. They are cool, perhaps I may get back into some pen on paper artistic streak which probably will not be a lasting project. heh. Also stumbled across a common verse that "our struggle is not against flesh and blood" a good reminder there is a greater spiritual battle going on behind the scenes of the above nonsense I have been writing.

Mount Keith

Day 4: I am currently site based for work now. I'm in the mid west of Western Australia, the desert. It has been a long awaiting for under 6 months now and it has been good. Different, because you are not exposed to what your routine is like back home. For me that is in the Perth metro / suburban.

The accommodation village about 15 mins south of the mine and Nickel plant facility has had power cuts and unfortunately does not have generators. Only the plant does. The heat kicks in when you have been sitting in air conditioned areas. Also water is affected without power. It would be an inconvenience if you were half way in a shower with soapy hair and the power is cut. hhaha.. Just before heading to sleep last night the power cut and I was glad I brought a torch to bring the washing in from the rain. It was very hot lying there on the bed. Thankfully the power kicked back in an hour later.

The closest town is ~85km north, Wiluna or another one over an hour's drive at Leinster. Facilities at the village are gym, wet mess (tavern), dry mess (dining hall, kitchen), swimming pool, tennis/bbl/cricket courts, computer area (where I am now getting access to internet), sit around grass areas and a track around to go for walks or runs.

At work, the plant seems really complex at first with tanks, piping, cables, instruments, pumps running everywhere but it is possible to get use to where and what things are eventually. I'd need many more days here though. It is also very hot out at the plant, 40+ degrees. Looking forward to see what winter will hold as the conditions are at extremes out here.

As for the people of course it is predominantly males onsite but I wasn't surprised about that. However there are girls around too so it's not a complete isolation from the female gender.

Anyway logging out to grab some dinner at dry mess....I'm changing my mind now that maybe I should go for a run to get into routine.